The Hamster is dead

Yes, Pinky has finally died...cos I got too busy this week and forgot to feed it. But in the first place, it was never really my job to feed it! I juz had to keep doing it cos my STUPID sister lost interest.

I'm feeling guilty like shit cos like it starved to death. It died with its eyes open lor!!!!!!! Like what the hell?! I'd hate to die of starvation and it's like my fault that it had to suffer. =(....

I HATE MY SISTER!

Lesson to be learnt: Never let ur kid buy a pet if u urself dun feel for it..cos chances are they'll get bored and it'll die of neglect. Dammit!

Oh well, today didn't turn out so bad after all! Even managed to get Dad to pick me up on his way back....so that was alright.

Apparently Jon's not that pissed at us lah...just thought that it's a wasted opportunity -- which it really is; I thought so too. But what to do..if some pple are incompetent they juz are lah. ;/

Today's poetry reading went alright....not too bad....and I had a nice dinner together with Jon, Kiat, Du'c, Jared and this guy called Alan. Conversation soon drifted to Chestnuts Unloaded and twas really funny. I'm glad that things turned out well in the end....although I'm terribly exhausted and still(!!) sick...haven't managed to get rid of my cough, I'm relatively happy.

Ooh, forgot to add that I have a new partner for catechism and his name is Michael... who reminds me of Dwayne which means, he's kinda cute(muahahaha if not why else will I talk abt him on my blog right??) and he's quite initiative!! We had meeting on tues and I was thinking of asking him to come earlier this sat before class so we can decide what to do. But to my surprise, he beat me to it! Hrm....haven't seen this kinda initiative in quite a while....esp frm a guy! Pray that we will inspire each other to want to teach catechism with enthusiasm! =)

Feel a bit like Netto....feelings on a yo-yo, one min happy and the other sad...but I guess such is life. I have a poem tt I wrote the other day...haven't written for a long time....lemme go get it...

**Back! Feel free to comment on it....cos I guess I wonder whether my poems make sense or whether they're juz some disjointed attempt to be artistic. heh.

Water never tasted so sweet
Air never smelt so fresh
All I wanted was to sleep peacefully;
dreamless, uninterrupted sleep.
Deathly, sweet sleep

To be ill is more than just a physical disability.
Your mind gets numbed by the drugs and you lose focus,
No longer able to control the aimlessness,
deep sense of helplessness.
I am waiting... to be cured.
For someone to come.
When? I do not know.
But I wait.

Written at like 4 sthg in my morning when I awoke becos of this awful bitterness in my mouth that made me gag. So I forced myself to walk 3 floors down to the kitchen to eat bread in hopes that the taste would go away. It did -- for a while...and I was feeling so upset at my uncomfyness that I decided to write a poem.

Another similarly sian day. Had to sleep late last night cos was preparing props for my poetry reading at Book Cafe today.

Then...today is my longest day. No break, straight from 12-6. I know...there are pple who have worse, their's starts from 10....but still. It sucks. I have not dreaded going to sch so much since a few sems ago. What's worse.....I can't just go out or hang out after a bloody hard day at sch, I have to go and work.

It's damn stupid to be complaining abt the poetry thing when I was the one who agreed to take it up in the first place. I know. But what can i do??? It seems to keep getting on my nerves...maybe it's just a bad time, maybe I just bit of more than I could chew. Maybe........?!? And sch starts at 9am tmw. My freaking earliest day!!! I just hope tt I will feel better once rehearsals start proper...then I'd feel tt everything I'm doing is worth it.

Yesterday, went to watch Asian Boys Vol 2. It was a pretty damn gd show, tho damn long...and Ivan Heng came to talk to us!! But then, this morning juz got some email frm our organising guy saying tt Jonathan is pissed off at us cos apparently we were rude and ran off after the show, weren't able to articulate our feelings abt the show to Ivan when he doesn't even usually talk to the audience...and the cast was supposedly waiting for us to have a talk back session! Like how the f*** were we supposed to know we were supposed to be doing that??? I think it's a matter of not communicating properly their intention. Maybe it was communicated at the beginning but I was late so I didn't know. But it still seems very ridiculous and yuan wang lor!!! Like wassup? So after enjoying myself so much yesterday, it seems to me now like a ruined evening cos we've got to do stupid damage control, to appease Jon and Wild Rice. In order words, MORE WORK!

Aaargh.............

Today has been really quite sian lor. had to go to sch cos of a make up lesson...but then instead of it taking 4 hrs, it only took 1!! So I juz nua-ed the whole day in sch lor...and then I have to rush to esplanade halfway through CG cos the praxis class is taking going tonight.

Now....at least some laughs while watching the CAW play cos although I'm not acting I'll be left all alone in the canteen. Sianz. It's like so fun lor and I'm a bit sadded tt I can't sing or play the bitchy Angel thing again. Haiz. Oh well.....everything in good time.

Chonghan's leaving this friday....think I'm gonna miss him cos then there'll be no one who will be interested enuff to watch plays wif me anymore! kekeke.....and of cos there's much more than tt lah.

Ooh, and Jac bought a lovely laptop(which i am using now!!) Damn chio man!

I WANNA RUN AWAY!!!

To somewhere with a better climate, nicer scenery, less stupid and irritating pple and nicer guys -- to a totally different environment.

Not gonna happen anytime soon. Bah!